Monday, January 31, 2011


my stomach is feeling awkwardly painful tonight. this leads me to believe that one (or all) of the following is true:

scenario 1: i have eaten far too many of CF's delicious fiber one bars that taste like a snickers made of oats, and now my body is starting to fight back.

scenario 2: i have consumed far more apple juice in the past month than anyone ever thought was humanly possible, and now the laws of science/biology are going crazy and there is an apple tree growing inside my stomach.

scenario 3: DC's absurd lead-pipe-contaminated-water is finally taking its tole on me and i am developing some kind of strange tumor right behind my belly button.

essentially what i'm saying is that tomorrow i'm giving up fiber one bars, apple juice, and any kind of unfiltered water i might come in contact with.
This morning the Chinatown Metro smelled like hot glue. Now, I am a firm believer that, like Duct Tape, hot glue can fix nearly anything. The key word here being nearly. Maybe if they stopped using supplies from the craft box to fix high speed trains, the Red Line would stop having so many problems.

Sunday, January 30, 2011

Saturday, January 29, 2011

250th Post

I just took a melatonin with Diet Coke. I feel like that may have been counterproductive, but I feel like a champ.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

Wednesday, January 26, 2011


Today's post is not a summer time song, but I just needed to post it, and felt that with my already video-heavy blog, two might just be too much today.

So earlier today my boss and I were talking about stipends, and how the majority of them are strictly minority based rather than actual need based. Kinda sucks, huh? Ben Folds definitely got it right this time.

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Monday, January 24, 2011

DC Observations:

Observation #1: People in DC do not eat, they just drink Starbucks. A lot of it.

Observation #2: No one in DC actually does Yoga, but everyone carries around a yoga mat and loves to talk about it.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Saturday, January 22, 2011

Sham On

Last night I had a dream that I met William Shatner in an airport. He was very nice and let me take pictures with him, and then we talked about Star Trek for a while. I really love my celebrity dreams.

Friday, January 21, 2011

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Sunday, January 16, 2011

ok, not that i'm really in to this, but i just don't understand how someone could make the decision to change the zodiac. i have always been and will refuse to be anything but a gemini.

Friday, January 14, 2011


Thursday, January 13, 2011

Oooooh K

The other night my family and I watched Biggest Loser, and I totally support people wanting to be healthy. So not to sound rude here, but I wonder if I could get paid not to get fat in the first place.


Wednesday, January 12, 2011

Last night I dreamed I was at the CAA conference in New York. I was in the elevator and I met a Guerrilla Girl. I was super excited, and then she took off her mask and it was actually Griselda Pollock. Best elevator dream ever.

Live Version

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Monday, January 10, 2011

I Hate Winter:

In an effort to will Summer to come faster, I will be posting a new song dedicated to my cause (nearly) every day. I think this is a good one to start with, don't you?

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

2010: Highlights

January: The Future…and NYC.

February: Xtine and I made the cutest Valentines ever seen.

March: ADVENTURE! Visit from two of my favorite people ever to exist.

April: Easter visit from the fam!


June: My blirthday and the epic invention of pop-shots. Also, concert extravaganza.

July: Fourth of July Party with the best Independence Day costumes anyone has ever laid eyes on.

August: The sad sad end of Summer, which concluded nicely with the coolest airbrush trucker hat ever invented.

September: Last real semester at BYU. Moved in to the basement with Xtine. Great. Decision. Also I met the kid who would become Prince. No, not the real one, but better.

October: Someone stabbed herself in the arm with an awl and we had adventure time in the Cotton Tree Inn. JONSI! And Halloween as Barbie.

November: Sufjan. That was enough to make the year worth it.

December: My teacher told me I was "hostile and offensive," and then I finished with Utah. Forever. Hallelujah. Also, had a _____-kickin’ time in Arizona with the fam.